Faith

I’ve been hearing a lot of different things about “faith” lately, and it started to make me wonder what faith really is. According to Webster,

1 a : allegiance to duty or a person : loyalty b (1) : fidelity to one’s promises (2) : sincerity of intentions

2 a (1) : belief and trust in and loyalty to God (2) : belief in the traditional doctrines of a religion b (1) : firm belief in something for which there is no proof (2): complete trust

3 : something that is believed especially with strong conviction; especially: a system of religious beliefs <the Protestant faith>

Of course, there is the popular Hebrews 11:1 description of faith,

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. (NLT)

or

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. (NKJV)

Regardless of whether a person is religious or not, the word faith has probably played a role. Either as the antonym of “doubt” or “fear”, or maybe as a synonym for “belief”.

I.E.

“Hey, I’m not buying this.” “Man, just have faith.”

OR

“Are you kidding me, this is terrifying. ” “Man, just have faith.”

OR

“I don’t think I can do this.” “Man, I have faith in you.”

“Have faith” is a phrase heard over and over again, but what does it mean? If I say I have something, it’s pretty clear that I own it, or possess it. If someone else tells me to “have something”, it usually means they possess it and are freely giving it to me or that they have deemed it under their realm of authority to  transfer it to me.

I.E.

“I have a muffin.”

OR

“That’s a lovely vase.” “Really? Man, you can have it.”

OR

<Sitting in a waiting room> “I really want to eat that muffin.” “Man, it’s free for anyone to take, just have it.”

What if people saying “just have faith” are misspeaking and really intend to say, “you have to have faith”. It takes on a different meaning. Now can either be something they have ownership of and can freely “allow” you to take or receive, or now, realizing your life is lacking and in desperate need, they have taken it upon themselves to make you aware of that fact, from either good intent or pride.

I.E.

“Oh my goodness man, to have to have this chocolate mousse, it’s to die for.”

OR

“Man, you have to have the ability to deal with your own problems.”

What’s funny about faith in Christianity is that faith is associated with a group of powerful words: hope and love (1 Cor 13:13) that, at least in my opinion, are significantly more prevalent and better understood in society. Having hope and having love aren’t as vague as having faith. Clearly, you can hope and can love, but can you faith? We can distinguish between hoping and wishing (Mandela’s character hopes, the audience wishes); loving and liking; but what about faith and belief? Can hope exist without defeat (or its existence), can love exist without hate (or its existence), can faith exist without fear/doubt (or its existence)?

When the thought of “having faith” came to mind, my concept of faith evolved over time. Originally, I thought you have to take the fear you have and make it into faith.

Aren’t faith and fear mutually exclusive though? Should one only exist in the absence of the other?

Let’s be real though, can any person really be without fear? It would seem like no ordinary person would be able to have faith if this were the case, but what if it were more gradual?

As fear dissipated, faith would overtake it. Right? Yet, the concept of being 30% full of fear and 70% full of faith doesn’t make sense. If I’m afraid, i’m afraid, and if I have faith, I have faith, don’t I? Can I be 100% fearful and 100% faithful?

What if faith isn’t acting to remove fear, but acting in spite of fear – a person’s faith wouldn’t be a demographic on the back of a card, like someone’s height or weight. It would be the result of a decision a person took every single day of his/her life. Do I take the step, or not?

So what does it take for you to be willing to jump over that giant chasm in front of you called Fear? Maybe it comes down to what you focus on. How about instead of focusing on what’s clearly visible; fear, we chose to focus on what’s on the other side, the invisible?

Inspiration. I remember reading a letter from Compassion’s Child Survival Program about the number of children dying in third world countries and how some money I had donated had saved lives. Pretty impressive story; probably to get more money out of me. I read about a young mother and boy who was about 15 months old and on the verge of death. The money donated through this program was able to give him hospital care and save his life. What about about the long term effects; how could this affect population crises and is this kind of work really sustainable in the long run? Money, population crises, sustainability? Really? Lives are being saved, and hurting people are being comforted. Inspiration.

Find whatever it takes for you to forget those visible distractions and focus on the ultimate good at the end. Different people have different means of being inspired; if the next step of faith is what you need to take, get inspired.

Planty the Potted Plant

I bought a plant for my apartment. Let’s call him Planty.

It took somewhere between 30 and 40 minutes to pick Planty out from among his peers to be my own. Calling it a journey of discovery would be a tad misguided since most of the time was made up of standing still glaring at plant information tabs and wondering how I could convert units such as direct, indirect, or low to lumens, and how I didn’t know what a lumen actually was. I also started wondering about which direction my windows face and why my school didn’t offer Guugu Yimithirr as a foreign language (what?); would’ve been useful – what’s that saying about hindsight?

After I paced back and forth between shrubbery, bushes, miniature trees, flowers, and the like – cautiously dragging my flip-flop laden (slightly cold) feet so as not to wet and rewet them with what I assumed to be leftovers of Planty’s lunch  - I decided to pick the Peace Lily, Planty the Peace Lily. My decision was based on some algorithm involving size, maintenance upkeep, color, and sunlight and window face direction estimations. What the formula actually was; I can’t recall.

I bought the plant from a cashier from Home Depot. Let’s call her Home Depot Lady.

I finally walked over to the check out aisle, most probably to the relief of Home Depot Lady. She really liked my selection of plant, and gave me some tips on how to care for it. A good amount of sunlight and not too much water. She felt the soil and mystically gathered how much moisture was within, sharing that I wouldn’t have to water Planty for another week; 7 days. A warning though: too much water and Planty would become jaundiced; not enough water – and Planty would start looking… well, more like me.

My new plant needed some space that required moving stuff around. Let’s call it Rearrangement.

I started noticing how much bigger or smaller you can make a room look by simply shifting a couch or table a few inches one way or the other. Even though the physical distance between the couch and the television hadn’t changed, it seemed a lot farther away. I didn’t consider Rearrangement in my algorithm. Planty – high maintenance.

Day 5 – Planty starts drooping. Day 5 != Day 7, so it can’t be a lack of water… clearly it’s not in the right position to get the most sunlight. I moved Planty around the apartment as the sun moved across the sky to make sure he got what he needed, all the while thinking, “This is definitely not sustainable.”  No matter; Planty kept getting more and more depressed as the day rolled on.

My vast knowledge of botany is summarized as follows: Sunlight + Water = Healthy Plant. If Sunlight goes up, but Healthy Plant is still going down, Water must be going down faster than Sunlight rises.

A good washing down, and a day later, Planty was stretching upward and outward.

It taught me something. Planty did what he could with what he had. Regardless of how much Planty “tried” to look healthy, it didn’t amount to much – at least to an outside perspective like my own.

I think people are like that sometimes. Those things that we pride ourselves in; things that we would like to define ourselves by are things that we are most willing to hide when we think they are deficient. Although not especially enlightening, when we try to be strong, or do the best with what we’ve got – distracting outsiders with charades so our wounds are hidden – we tend to expose ourselves even further.

Frustrated

He walked back and forth, occasionally glancing at the monstrosity on the far corner of the room. It hadn’t always been a monstrosity – but unanswered questions, unprovoked gestures, and awkward silences had exponentially taken a gentle, rhythmic giant to a overtly ostentatious beast. A raucousness of sharp clangs along with uncoordinated and tumultuous steps at an instant’s notice drove him to frustration. “Why now?”

Swarm. The day’s schedule summarized in seconds. Could-do’s became Must-do’s. Might-do’s became Must-do’s. To-Do’s became Must-do Now’s. Must-do’s became burdensome. A glance at the clock; it was reining. “What for?”

Reflect. Murals of vibrant memory clips separated by a thin strand of logic become sequential events. Much like a reel of film. And just as cumbersome to roll up tidily if carelessly left to its own will. “Why not?”

Release. The countdown, the anticipation – the fear. “When?”